Hip Hop is the universal sound of the culture. It has indoctrinated and inspired millions. Hip Hop subconsciously affects how we think, speak, dress and move in life. For a cheque, I can write the manual on it, although I re-iterate the cheque will have to be lovely. For those Hip Hop purists, you may want to click off the post as the next five entries are from the school of high cholesterol cooning. Pardon the terminology but it is difficult to find another adjective befitting of these entertainers. Personally, I do not believe there are any rules or parameters in Hip Hop apart from 90% of the rappers are from poverty. Rags to riches. This probably fuels the art regardless of which lane you choose to go down. Besides that the other over-riding rule is “Get money”, which I thoroughly respect.
There have been many LOL moments in Hip Hop this year. The following are the Top 5 clowns from the circus act, and I mean that respectfully!
This was the friendliest picture I could find ..
Ar-Ab is the top flight goon of Philadelphia. He is the guy who Drake was alluding to in Back to Back. It is extremely difficult to think Drake is actually bumping Ar-Ab in the Wraith, respectfully. Ab is a sKreet rapper who has a no holds barred interview style. He comes out with lines that reveal the extent to which the environment he grew up in corrupted his outlook on life. Ab was on This is 50 and was explaining the difference in cultures between West Coast rapper The Game and Philly nemesis, Meek Mill.
In the Westcoast, they work out and get buff but in Philly everything is the gun, they go straight to the gun!
I pray nobody has rap beef with Ar-Ab as his mentality is if you diss him then he is prepared to cancel Christmas on his opponent. Spooky!
4. Blac Youngsta
Blac Youngsta doing what he does best!
The next contender is Memphis rapper, Blac Youngsta who is down with CMG and fellow Memphis rapper Yo Gotti. He is famed for his high cholesterol cooning by way of bricks of money and stunting. When Youngsta is not toting weapons on social media with Memphis goons he is flossing. He went up to a nationally syndicated radio show, The Breakfast Club, with a cash counter in tow. In a hungry white wife-beater vest he counted bricks of cash. However, the moment that eclipsed this and led to his entry in this short-list is the below clip.
He was fully on one. He said that he impregnated the money and then he started speaking in a different language. I am not sure if he was speaking in tongues as there is nothing overtly spiritual about this clip. Respect to this coon.
3. Young Thug
I am not going to front, Thug’s music goes in. The melody is undeniable and I respect the frequency of his artistic output. Before the release of his August mixtape, “Jefferey”, Thug decided to use a new moniker.
The artist formerly known as “Young Thug” is now referred to as “No My Name is Jefferey”
Joke ting. I love the comedy behind this move. This is a guy who is renowned for “smoking penises” referring to long rolled L’s and “toting those dicks” referring to handguns with extended clips. When Thug is not on that B gang shit he is rocking out in the cross-dressing world. A pretty thug that will shoot you. Pause.
No My Name is Jefferey – Jefferey EP, 2016
Thug recently called some black women who work at TSA, “nappy haired bitches” and “peasants.” The level of disrespect is equally real to the comedy. Shout out to this coon!
2. Rico Recklezz
The Boogie Man of Chiraq – Rico Recklezz on Foe Nem!
Chiraq had to feature in this short-list. In reality, I could have devised a list based on their city alone. Shout out to the Clout Lord, Lil Jay. Rico Recklezz, is a slick and fast-talking Chiqraq savage who has some next Eddie Murphy laugh. There is not much that is funny about this guy as he is clearly with the shits. It was bewildering to think that he was involved in a beef with Soulja Boy Tell em. Rico went directly to Soulja Boy’s crib by way of Air BnB. He was vlogging on social media and rolled up with a couple man. He told the hotel concierge that he was present to collect an SODMG chain (the crew that Soulja Boy runs).
Whats up y’all, Rico Recklezz .. Rico Recklezz .. Soulja Boy signed me, I’m here to pick up my SODMG chain
1. Soulja Boy
Soulja Boy is the undisputed coon of the year. He has had back to back beef this year. The videos he cuts are hilarious. The shenanigans are more outrageous than everyone else on the list. Where do we begin with this guy? The “Crank That” star has beefed Lil Yachty, Rico Recklezz and now Quavo of the Migos. I love the way he progressively gets irate in his videos. Soulja beefed Yachty over a thot, India Love, who is a problem. Shorty is a Hip Hop composite. Light-skinned, thick and tatted and gatted.
Your hair looks like twizzlers boy, I’ll smack the beads out your motherfucking hair
If this was not enough, Soulja vowed he would beat up and shoot Rico Recklezz’s black ass. Each time Rico attempted to catch Soulja lacking he said he was out the country. In Dubai or in France cashing cheques. The beef was like Tom and Jerry, I found it hilarious.
The most hilarious moment when Soulja Boy pulled out The Draco. The weapon that settles the dispute on sight. He fumbled around in his designer backpack. He did not pull out a Beats by Dre headphone set. He pulled out The Draco. Soon after doing this he apologised to Rico Recklezz and said he intends to do music with him. Joker.
Hip Hop is the funniest genre of music in the world. The characters in Hip Hop are unrivalled. Apologies to the progressive co-commentators of the culture. I would recommend, J Cole’s latest project as the right way to balance out the ignorance of this post.
I wonder who will be on the short-list in 2017.
These guys have a talent and are highly paid for their shenanigans. Just remember “It’s all entertainment!”
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